Guest Interview: Meg Gluckman

​This series of guest interviews is part of the Practicing Together project - a 6 month exploration of the 5 Practices framework that I use in my Seeds of Connection groups.  Each guest was invited to choose 5 questions from a list of over 60 questions that were based on the different practices.  The questions are being posted over the next many months on my Instagram feed - follow along and answer them for yourself, and see how others in the community are reflecting on these topics.  A new guest interview will be posted to this blog every Friday from June through November 2022.  Read more about the Practicing Together project and join us for the monthly Community Calls for deeper exploration!

Today's Guest Interview is with Meg Gluckman, life & biz coach, mom, decision maker, and fabulous human.  I've known Meg for almost 10 years now.  We met at a workshop (facilitator training!) and I told her I liked her shoes and that we were going to be best friends.  And so it was. (lol)  In the questions she chose, Meg dives deep into grief, self acceptance, and the arc of justice.  It's the first interview in the series and it's a GREAT one!  
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Leave a comment and share your thoughts, or share your answers to the questions Meg chose.

What false stories, myths, or constructs have you believed about yourself?
For most of my life, I believed my leg hair was ugly.  I believed I couldn’t be sexy with leg hair; that no one would find me attractive. It took me deciding that I REALLY wanted to feel AMAZING with leg hair to finally figure out how to change my beliefs. The world wasn’t going to change and suddenly start telling me my hair leg was the sexiest thing since slice bread. I had to fully generate that belief myself. 

I started by replacing my negative thoughts with more neutral thoughts like, “human legs grow hair”. Once those neutral beliefs came easily, I started with slightly more positive thoughts, like “I’m open to believing hairy legs could be sexy.” Over time, I’ve grown my belief that my legs are attractive & sexy! 

I love that we can change our beliefs about ourselves. We really can believe anything we want!

What is your relationship with the concept of “boundaries”?
My perspective of boundaries has shifted a lot in the last few years. I used to think boundaries were about clarifying what other people could do. I’d spend a lot of time in frustration, resentment, and anger when people did not adhere to my boundaries. How dare they! 

Now I see boundaries as clarifying for ME what I will do if/when someone does something. Now I make a whole lot more requests of others in my life and take responsibility for my safety and happiness. The result is I have a lot more of what I want and am actually enjoying my life more than I ever have!

What are your thoughts about grief? 
My Dad passed away in 2021. We had a very close relationship. I learned two big lessons from his death:

1. I get to keep loving him every day & I can keep feeling his presence. That’s a choice I get to make. Those are feelings I get to cultivate. I have many pictures of him in my house and I’ll often say hi to him or talk to him about something challenging going on in my life. Or sometimes I’ll tell him about a celebration. I feel like I always know in my heart how he would respond. I choose to have this kind of relationship with him. 
   
   
2. I learned about the Dual Processing Theory of Grief, which is that we can alternate between deep sadness & grief, and also moments/hours/days of other life activities. I needed both. Moments in the depths, and moments of reprieve from the depths. And neither was wrong. When I allowed myself both, I found that I was the most grounded and healthy. 

Many of us in the U.S., especially white folks, have not grown up with grief practices and traditions. We have the task of creating our own when the time arises. Grief can enrich our lives and connect us even more to our humanity and to those with whom we share this life.

What are some of the mantras or kind words you offer yourself to get through tough times?
I choose to believe that we are witnessing the disintegration of white supremacy and patriarchy. I see this as a choice and I know not everyone agrees with me. But I choose to believe we’re on the right path and things are improving.

When I see hateful, controlling government policies enacted, like the anti-trans legislation in Texas or the Supreme Court overturning Roe v. Wade, I choose to believe these are the last-ditch, clawing attempts of a dying system that has lost the fight.  I know the impact of these policies is devastating to many, and has significantly harmful impacts. I don’t take the policies lightly- we still need to fight and work to create a world we really want. I just choose also to believe that there is much more momentum behind social justice and equity than hate. 

I come back to MLK Jr.’s quote: “The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.”

I don’t believe it’s a magical thing that will happen without effort, but I believe our effort plus the momentum of the world, bends towards justice & equity. 

Are there tools or practices you engage with to be more present in your life?
I play marimba, a wooden percussion instrument from the Shona people of Zimbabwe, ever week with my friends. I find the music to be very rhythmically grounding and meditative- I can’t think about anything else when I’m playing!

​I’m happiest when I can walk every day and try to get out into the woods whenever possible. 

I love reading to my kids aloud, even though they are both excellent readers. It’s a time for us to be together, to be still, and to be calm. We’re on book #4 of Harry Potter and they say we can’t read anything else until we get through the series! 

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BIO

Meg is a life coach for humans who want to enjoy their lives more and the host of the Powerful Decisions Podcast. She’s also a mini-van driving mom, who loves growing asparagus and tomatoes, beating anyone at Connect 4, and skinny dipping. You can follow her on Insta @meggluckman and try out her free course, Getting Unstuck with Self Coaching at her website. She’s also #1 Super Fan of Crystal Gurney.

Meg will be the guest presenter at our June Community Call to walk us through an exercise that will help us connect to our future self.  JOIN US!  June's call is Wed, 06/29 @ 6pm (PST) and will focus on this month's practice of Curiosity & Care.  Calls are virtual and open to anyone.

Click here to see details about the Community Calls and get registered.